Unexpected Chances
by forverklainer
Summary: Kurt is informed he is pregnant, after putting off telling Blaine, once he finally does the result is not a good one. There are tears and heartache in deciding if the have what they need, or if Kurt can even survive the birth. There may be an unexpected Chance.


**A/N: Hello readers! I would like to first thank you for reading! This is about my 7****th**** fanfiction on here, so I have written some before. I am in a role-play with my best friend, and we have been at it for about 8 months! I play Kurt, and she is Blaine. Together we have created an amazing story! So I would like to defiantly give her a huge heap of credit for this. Trust me, I would love to share the whole entire role-play with you but 8 months is a long time haha. Some things you should know for this story: They both have four kids already; one is going off to college. And they once had a miscarriage. This is also an M-Preg fanfic, so Kurt can give birth, and that's about it! The other day we had an amazing story line that gave me this fic idea(: so I hope you all enjoy!**

**All rights go to glee on fox!**

Kurt and Blaine lay on their bed holding each other with care. Kurt had been acting somewhat strange, and Blaine was very quick to catch on. However, the last few days Kurt hadn't exactly been jumping to share.

Kurt stroked Blaine's curls looking into his hazel eyes, "You okay?" he asked.

"Yeah, I just feel…really happy and sentimental right now and I want to be close to you."

This made Kurt smile warmly at his husband. "Alright." He nodded rubbing his back soothingly.

"Are _you_ okay?"

He just nodded and shrugged "I'm fine." Although both him and Blaine knew it wasn't the truth.

"What about earlier?"

This once again had Kurt shrug. "That was…earlier."

"I still care." Blaine told him softly.

Kurt wanted to tell him so badly, more than anything. Overall, just being terrified of the consequences. He shook slightly, knowing he had already waited too long, no matter when or how he told him; it would still be to late.

He slightly sighed. "I know you do."

Blaine did all he could to let Kurt know that he could feel right around him. "Is there anything you need to tell me?"

Kurt took a deep breath, slightly shaking his head at his thoughts. "I guess I don't really want to get into it right now."

This made Blaine bite his lip in concern. Kurt not telling anything was making him anxious as ever. "So it is something? Did I do something?"

Putting Kurt's nerves into gear, he made sure Blaine didn't put this on himself. "No," He shook his head. "You didn't do anything wrong." He told him reassuringly.

"What about the kids?"

Kurt sighed, "Nobody did anything, i-it's not like that." He stuttered over his words.

He furrowed his eyebrows, knowing this couldn't be some kind of a game, or a mild problem. Kurt was never distant to tell him something. "Then what is it like?"

He let out a breath before figuring out how to respond. "I'm really not even sure about it anymore, I don't think this is a good time."

"Then when is a good time?"

Kurt started nervously playing with Blaine's hand. "I don't know." He replied.

"Kurt, I hope you're comfortable around me." Blaine said so softly it almost hurt, it was already killing Kurt doing this.

"Of course I am." He reassured him with no hesitation.

"And trust me?"

"Yes, completely."

"And you know you can tell me anything."

Kurt had to take in a deep breath. With every word coming out of Blaine's mouth he felt himself getting closer and closer to telling him. "I know I can," he told him softly. "It's just that I'm not sure about it, and I just don't think I want to get into it, especially with spring break so close."

Blaine slowly nodded along with his explanation and took a breath as he finished. "I understand."

"I'm sorry." Kurt said with compassion, trying his best to show Blaine he really did care, he just couldn't bring himself to say the words. "I really don't have the intentions of hiding something from you."

"I know."

Kurt sighed again, he mentally slapped himself for not growing a pair and just getting it out, he knew if he didn't today, it would have to be tomorrow. Otherwise Blaine would for sure find out for himself

The words had Blaine gently pull away from Kurt's grasp. "Night."

Kurt's breath was slowly quickening, his heart was racing, almost feeling as if he was seeing spots and he would pass out at any second. "Blaine."

He just kissed his forehead in reply.

"You're mad."

"No I'm not."

"I can see that you are." Kurt played with the sheets distracting himself.

"I'm not mad, Kurt."

"Yes you are," He shook his head. "You're mad that I'm not telling you."

"I'm upset, okay? I'm fine." He almost mumbled the last part, having Kurt hesitate more, from fear of angering him. He took a deep breath and laid back."

"I love you." Blaine said turning away."

"A-A baby." Kurt said so quiet it was barley even hearable.

"I know."

This immediately widened Kurt's eyes, his pulse raced. Blaine knew? "What?"

"You're pregnant."

"Y-you do?" He asked shakily.

Blaine quickly sat up turning to him. "What?"

Kurt was at a complete loss for words, feeling so helpless and trapped. "I-I you said you knew." Blaine slowly nodded.

Kurt blinked quickly, in utter shock. "How?"

"It was a guess that I chose not to share, but know that I know I'm right, I am mad." He almost huffed standing grabbing his pillow and blankets.

"What?" Kurt stood on his side. "Why are you mad?"

Blaine let out an angry sigh. "Because this is big, Kurt! This isn't nothing."

Kurt couldn't say he was surprised. He knew from the moment he started keeping this from Blaine that he would regret it, standing there having things pan out that way.

"I know it's not!" He yelled back as tears began to form. "But you were so set on the family you have now, and I couldn't hide it forever, but I didn't want to ruin your picture perfect family!"

Blaine's eyes narrowed. "I told you I would accept changes, Kurt, do you not listen?" He asked with a hurt tone in his voice.

"I-I'm sorry I was just to busy freaking out."

"Then why would you keep it from me?" Blaine couldn't believe what he was hearing at this point; he tried his best every single day to show Kurt his affection in any way, so he could to maintain this healthy relationship. This conversation was almost like a knife tearing through it all.

"I was going to wait till after break." He confessed.

"Are you really pregnant?"

Kurt glared at Blaine, feeling a sense of distrust and hurt. "Yes, Blaine."

"You went to the doctor and everything?" He tried his best to keep his voice firm. "Alone?"

"No," Kurt sniffled; taking is eyes off of Blaine. "I took three tests and they were all positive. I haven't been to a doctor yet."

Blaine shook his head at the confessions. Sitting on the bed, resting his head in his hands, having this all sink in before he realized, "I didn't wear a condom."

Fast tears fell as Kurt gave him a stiff nod.

He had to hold back a sob. "You didn't tell me."

Neither of them could believe anything. It was just a big pool of words they were both diving into.

"Blaine, I just figured this all out," He couldn't help but sob. "I was trying to tell you, I just wanted to avoid all of this." He told him shaking his head in despair.

"You must really hate me." Tears rolled quickly down his cheeks. "I knock you up at the peak of your career not once, but twice! God, I'm just perfect." He huffed mockingly at himself. "Ruining my husbands dreams. I'm sorry, Kurt, I am."

"Don't say that," Kurt told him as firmly as he could while crying. Blaine looked up at him, his eyes red as tears quickly spilled out. "You haven't ruined anything, this is all my fault. I was so stupid and oblivious. And then I decide to wait a week to tell you thinking it'll all be okay." He looked away, ashamed of himself.

Blaine stood. "Kurt, stop." He told him softly, taking both of his hands, looking him in his deep blue eyes. "We're not focusing on the real…situation. The baby."

Kurt took in a shaky breath, nodding as more tears fell. " Have you been healthy? Any morning sickness?" he asked gently rubbing his thumb under Kurt's eyes, "are you sleeping well?"

Kurt sniffled. "I'm alright." He answered giving a small shrug."

He nodded, and then softly cupped his cheek. "We're going to be okay." He breathed, looking at him, making sure to show his love. "I swear to you, Kurt, this will be okay."

More tears fell from his pleading eyes. "How do you know?" He asked with a weak voice. "I don't know if I can do it, or if we can support another child, or how we will have enough room." His breathing quickened with each statement.

Blaine couldn't help but emit a shaky breath. "Kurt," He started closing his eyes in attempt to gather his thoughts. "You know there's always a way out."

Kurt gave a small nod as he cried softly. He had never felt this way in his life. Complete utter terror lapped around his mind."

"Whatever you want to do…I'll be by your side." He told him as Kurt closed his eyes.

"What do you want to do?"

He slowly shook his head. "I don't know what options we have."

"I think…there are three options." He informed him taking another deep breath. "Keeping it, giving it away, or never having it." This had more tears escape Kurt's eyelids, the situation becoming heavier with the reality getting to him."

"I don't know." He told him quietly.

Blaine squeezed his hand in comfort. "It's up to you." Kurt shook his head.

"No, This is your child too, Blaine."

"It's your body."

"But I want to do what you want too. The pain isn't what matters to me." He swallowed hard. "Just as long as you're happy."

"No, Kurt," He stated firmly. "Having kids almost killed you multiple times. I am not going through that pain again!"

Tears continued to glide their way down Kurt's red face. "So what do you want?"

Blaine had trouble getting out an explanation through the small sobs. "I w-want you to see a d-doctor so we can-can figure this out." He sniffled trying to get himself together. "I want you alive. I want a family. A complete family, with a husband and kids. And I don't c-care how many kids we have. I just want you and them." He looked at Kurt through the moist still-falling tears. "Whether there is four or nineteen, I don't care. Kurt, we are a team." He let out another shaky breath. "And i-if you give up for what you think is my happiness, I will never forgive you. I will not allow you to breakup our family, Kurt. Please," His voice cracked pleading. "Please."

Kurt shook his head choking out a sob. "I wont, I promise." He nodded. "I won't breakup our family. If there's a chance I have to survive it then I will do everything in my power to make sure I survive." He swallowed hard. "And if there's any other way, I will do it. I will do anything for our family." He told him as the tears quickened.

He couldn't help but grasp onto Kurt tightly, sobbing his heart out onto his shoulder. Kurt closed his eyes tightly, weakly holding onto Blaine. Trying his best to show the comfort that he was running so low on. He felt broken, he felt like he had all these pieces that had foreign words on them, having such limited time to put it all together again.

After a little, Blaine said softy, "There's always a chance …the baby's…not…there." He made hand motions with the sentence to try and support his theory.

Kurt gave a stiff nod, his confidence shot at the chance. "Maybe."

"I want to go tomorrow."

He took a deep breath, knowing he had no choice. "Okay."

Blaine then kissed him, a soft tender kiss that told Kurt without words that they would find a way out of this; the broken pieces would get fixed. It would take a while, but they would.

Kurt held him close, both of them struggling to fight off more tears. "It will be okay," He said wiping his eyes. "We will never give up, and it will all work out, it has to."

He just nodded giving a weak response. "I kn-know." Kurt held him close, almost terrified to ever let go. "

"I'm so scared." Blaine breathed. Closing his eyes lightly, allowing the tears to slowly glide down. His cheeks and tear ducts were having a burning sensation.

"I am too." Kurt repeatedly admitted.

Blaine just cried. There was no holding it in. No taking time to calm down. Right now crying was their only escape, as if the sobs were some sort of answer. They held each other exchanging sobs for as long as they could remember. Kurt had to constantly remind himself why he was crying, holding his husband so tight. But the repeated assurance only made his body shake more violently.

"Shh," Blaine soothed him, rubbing his back. "We'll be fine, it'll be okay." He told him, softly stroking his hair back.

One of the most painful parts was not knowing if it was actually okay. They said these words with such little truth behind them.

Blaine slowly led him back to bed, comforting him gently. He continued to shake at the attempts of avoiding the sobs.

He held Kurt close to his chest, not ready to let go any time soon.

"I-I'm s-sorry." Kurt told him. Pushing the sobs into Blaine's shirt.

"No, no, don't be, Kurt. It's not your fault." Kurt only tightened his grip onto his pajama shirt, the sobs seeming as if the end was so very far.

Blaine held him even tighter, transferring his cries into Kurt's hair. His whole body was beginning to tremble, bringing Blaine to wrap a blanket tightly around them both, rubbing Kurt's back.

Slowly attempting to calm, Kurt told him shakily, "I promise, i-it'll be okay, I swear to you. I'll m-make it okay," He said followed with a shaky breath, fast tears escaping his eyes.

"I know, beautiful." He nodded wiping his eyes. "I trust you."

Kurt kept a firm hold on him. "I love you so much." He said with a whole heart, despite his weak tone.

"I love you too, you're my world." He looked right back into his eyes. The words sealed with a kiss.

Leaning their foreheads together, Blaine gave him a weak smile. It was the best thing Kurt had seen the whole night.

Kurt returned his smile. "Thank you."

"For what?"

"Just being here, holding me, and helping me with all of this. I know we'll be okay now."

Kurt was completely right in the past stating his regret, if he could go back and change his decision and tell Blaine the moment he found out, he would.

"You know," Blaine began, softly cupping his cheek. "Crying really brings out your blue eyes."

And that was the best thing Kurt had _heard_ all night. He stroked Blaine's hair back out of his face softly, and placed a soft kiss on his forehead.

"I love you, and our family will be okay, we'll be okay, and the baby will be okay."

Blaine's smile slightly dulled into a weak one. "I-I kn-know."

"Then what's still wrong?" Kurt asked softly.

"N-nothing okay? Don't worry," He told him wiping his eyes. "I'll get us through this." He told him with slight weakness, returning the kiss to his forehead.

This didn't convince Kurt in the slightest. "There's something wrong, I can see." He told Blaine looking into his eyes. He just shook his head in response.

"Promise me you'll tell me if you're upset? Or if anything is wrong?" Kurt asked with raised eyebrows.

Chocking on his own words, he just nodded.

"Okay." Kurt let a breath go with a slow nod.

Blaine then shook his head, allowing the sobs to escape. "I'm not okay."

Kurt kept the comfort applied to him as well as he could, holding him close. "What's wrong?"

"I kn-know we are saying we can do this, but I'm so scared. I feel like I have to be strong for the both of us. But I can't lie to you and say I'm fine when I'm not," fast tears made their way downward as he gripped Kurt's shirt tightly, gasping for air. "I can't do this without you."

Kurt nodded allowing his own tears to escape. "You don't have to fight for the both of us. You know we're a team. We'll make it through this." He spoke firmly, taking Blaine's hands in his own. "And I'm there for you just as much as you are for me through all this. I will find a way to make this okay. I can take care of this." He gave Blaine reassurance, as he gently wiped his falling tears. "I-If you don't want me to keep it because you're scared, then I'm o-okay with it."

"Right now," Blaine took a deep breath. "If it comes to you or the baby," He said fighting against more tears, but the sobs finding their way out. "We all need you."

Fast tears fell from the both of them as Kurt nodded. "I will never leave all of you." He told him with a shaky breath. "Never."

Blaine buried his face into Kurt's chest, being terrified to his very core, with the comfort just now making it's way in. Kurt held him close, determined to give him the equivalent care.

"It's okay," He said rubbing his back. "I will fight, and when it comes down to it, I swear I will be alive to take care of all of you." He said with a voice stronger than he thought he could manage.

Taking gasping breaths, Blaine gave his best attempt at calming down. Slowly their sobbing came to a dry end.

"I love you." Blaine told him softly.

"I love you too, more than anything."

Granting Blaine a small smile, He kissed Kurt's chest before lying back down. It wasn't long before sleep fell over both of them.

Come morning, Blaine groaned as he sat up, rubbing his burning eyes. Only moments later, Kurt did the same, yawning as he blinked quickly, praying the tingling sensation would leave soon.

Blaine looked to him. "We're a mess." He chuckled.

Kurt couldn't help but let out a small laugh himself. "We are."

Blaine laughed rubbing his face. "Oh my god." He said shaking his head with a warm smile. "We could have handled that better."

Looking back at the events of the previous night, there was no way to disagree. "We could've." He nodded followed with a small sigh.

"I mean, we didn't even focus on the positive."

"Exactly, we kept bringing everything down with every word we said." He added.

"Babies aren't meant to destroy families."

"Not at all." Kurt brushed the hair back from his face.

"They're so cute, and soft, and smell good."

He smiled at his husband. "They are all perfect."

"Especially ours, because I'm like 90% sure only one of them was planned."

Kurt had to laugh at that. "Oh my gosh, you're right." He shook his head smiling down.

Blaine chucked. "I always am. So there, two reasons we'll be okay. I'm always right, and babies don't destroy families because our babies are perfect." He smiled at his own statement.

He smiled right back at him, kissing his nose, followed by a tight hug.

"I'll go make that appointment." Blaine pulled away kissing his cheek.

"Okay," Kurt let out a breath he didn't know he was holding.

Blaine left the room, and Kurt got dressed, hoping today would be somewhat brighter.

In the next few moments, a short, adorable, curly haired, 8-year-old made his way into their bedroom.

"Hi sweetie." Kurt smiled.

"Are you and daddy getting a divorce?"

His face immediately turned concerned as his mind went back to the shouting, the crying, and the talking. He and Blaine were so distracted it slipped their minds that Logan was in the next room.

"Oh no honey," He shook his head, quickly sitting and pulling Logan onto his lap. "Daddy and I are not getting divorced." He told him very softly.

"B-But last night," Logan sniffled. "I woke up and realized I never brushed my teeth before going to bed, and so then I went to the bathroom and I heard you guys crying." He explained close to tears of his own.

Kurt let out a breath, thinking of the best response. "Daddy and I were crying," He nodded. "But we are not separating at all. You never have to worry about us splitting up, okay?"

He slowly nodded in understanding. "Then why were you crying?"

"It's about adult stuff you don't need to know about quite yet."

"Oh, is it about sex?"

Kurt's eyes widened at the language coming from his son. "N-No." he answered stiffly.

Logan just nodded and sighed. "Alright then."

"But it will be okay." Kurt told him softly.

"Pinky promise?" Logan asked holding up his pinky.

Kurt smiled at him. "Pinky promise." He linked pinkies with him.

His smile widened as Logan pressed a kiss to their connected pinkies. "That seals it." Kurt smiled back, kissing his head.

Only a couple hours later, they were heading out to their doctors appointment. Both were as nervous as ever.

"Can I come?" Belle asked.

"Yeah!" Lizzie had a wide smile, joining in.

"I'm sorry princess." Kurt kissed her head. "Daddy and I are just going, you can stay here and have fun with Jacob." He told her softly.

"But da," Lizzie caught his attention, lifting her arms up. "Pwease?"

He sighed, lifting her and kissing her head. "I love you, but not today."

Blaine couldn't help but chuckle. "That was a little mean." He said under his breath.

Kurt bit his lip. "Sorry, I love you both very much." He set Lizzie down and gave them both one last kiss.

Blaine picked her up and whispered something in her ear, making her giggle as he smiled tickling her. Kurt looked and smiled at them both.

"So is this gonna be long?"

Kurt looked back to Belle. "Not too long sweetie, we should be back in an hour."

"Okay, cause I was planning a tea party and you're invited so you gotta show up." She told him looking in his eyes.

"I'll be there." He smiled.

Her smile widened. "Thank you."

"My pleasure." He stood back up and got his coat on. "We should really get going now."

Blaine nodded and set Lizzie down, and kissed them goodbye.

In the doctor's office, Kurt was sure to take deep breaths; any extra nerves would just tighten the tension.

"Kurt, we'll be fine."

He nodded. "I know, I'm just nervous."

"If you're pregnant, we can handle it, if you're not, it'll be fine. We just need answers now before we leave." He told him calmly.

Kurt swallowed hard. "Right."

Blaine kissed the side of his head. They continued the sweet comforting sentiments of compassion toward each other; holding hands, soothing each other, little kisses.

"If we're having a baby, I hope it's a boy." Blaine brought up softly after a while.

That gave Kurt a warm smile. "Me too."

"He can share Logan's room."

"Defiantly." Kurt nodded in agreement.

"But girls are fine too." He added with a small shrug.

"Of course."

"I hope they're a mix of us."

Kurt looked off in the distance, seeing a little boy slightly stumbling up to both of them. With Kurt's hair color, Blaine's face and curls, beautiful hazel eyes, and a soft sweet voice. "I can imagine." He smiled.

"Best looking baby ever."

A while later, a nurse came and brought them both to a room. Blaine helped him onto the table, keeping hold of his hand.

"Everything's going to be fine."

Kurt nodded. "I know."

They had trouble finding the correct use of the repeated words, they knew it would be okay; it was getting there that would be the hard part.

"Simple too, we've done this three times."

Slightly smiling at the memories, Kurt agreed. "Yeah." He breathed.

"I could probably deliver the baby."

Kurt chuckled at his dorky husband, shaking his head.

"I could," He laughed. "Though I'm not good with blood, or any type of surgery, or needles."

Kurt just smiled and kissed his cheek as Blaine looked around the room, almost examining it.

"It's creepy in here."

"Creepy?"

"Yeah like, these scare me." Blaine said lightly touching the stirrups, then nodding to the posters. "It's weird that there's pictures of peoples insides, and the papers on the table, and those tongue things. I just don't like it."

Kurt had to agree with some of his statements, despite Blaine looking far to hard at everything. "I guess it is kind of weird feeling being in here, now that you've mentioned it."

"Very." Blaine nodded.

"But nothing we're not used to." Kurt pointed out.

"I guess." He shrugged in agreement. "I don't know how you do it."

Kurt raised his eyebrows. "You mean the birth part?"

"And any part where the doctor poked and prods you." Blaine told him with a shudder.

Kurt defiantly had to agree with him on that. He had been on countless uncomfortable positions in this place.

"What if I was the doctor?" Blaine suggested. "Would that be better?"

Kurt had to suppress a chuckle. "Um, maybe." He shrugged.

As if on a queue, the doctor came in. "Hello," He smiled. "How are we all today?"

Blaine shared a small smile with him. "Okay." Kurt had on only a tiny smile as he nodded looking down, playing with Blaine's hand.

"So this is…another pregnancy?" the doctor asked.

"Maybe." Blaine answered with a shaky breath.

"So you don't know yet?"

"Kurt said he took three tests and they were all positive, but I um did something dumb and we wanted to make sure with you before we go on vacation." He exclaimed rubbing Kurt's back.

The doctor got another test ready; a couple minutes later they sat in their previous places.

"Alright, we should get the results shortly." He told them.

"Thank you." Blaine said standing, having a firm hold on Kurt's hand.

The doctor returned only moments later. Kurt took in a shaky breath, staring at the floor.

"Would you like a minute or would it be best to know now?" The doctor asked softly.

"Now please." Blaine answered squeezing Kurt's hand lightly. "Is that okay with you?" He looked to Kurt, who just gave a stiff nod.

"Yeah, now." He agreed quietly. Blaine nodded and rubbed his back, trying to show his affection through every action possible to tell Kurt it would be okay.

Inside Kurt was shouting. Not wanting this to be confirmed or denied, he was so confused. Having the answer straight in front of him gave him a sense of weakness. The results would hurt him either way. His mind pleaded, _please please please. _But he didn't know exactly what he was begging for. Possibly just reassurance.

He took a deep breath "Kurt, you are pregnant." The doctor informed them softly.

Kurt's hands flew to his face as he shook his head quickly.

"Shh, hey, hey, its okay." Blaine soothed him softly rubbing his arms.

It was too late; Kurt had already broken down crying. "No it's not, it's not."

"I am very sorry, I'll leave you two alone."

Blaine kneeled in front of Kurt as the doctor steeped out of the room.

"Kurt, Kurt, look here, come on, deep breaths, it's okay, I'm not mad or upset." He said with a gentle soothing voice.

He held onto Blaine tight, trying to put an end to the tears.

"Shh," Blaine hugged him tightly as Kurt cried into his shoulder, weakly gripping his shirt.

"Kurt, I need you to take some deep breaths, okay? We need to talk this out."

He nodded, taking deep shaky breaths as he wiped his eyes.

"There." Blaine said kissing his head.

"What are we going to do?" Kurt asked him so quietly it was barley audible.

"Whatever you'd like."

"I have no idea what I want." He admitted helplessly.

"We should find out the risks first, okay?

Kurt took a deep breath and nodded. "Okay."

"Want me to get the doctor?" He asked softly brushing a strand of his hair away from his face.

"Please."

"Alright," he kissed Kurt's head once more before going out to the hallway.

In his absence Kurt hugged himself, slightly rocking back and forth. He never thought he could have this feeling of helplessness being with Blaine, neither of them could do anything about it though. It wasn't a song, a kiss, or a smile they had to fix. This was bigger than the both of them. They were both in different dark places with the same consequences to face.

Blaine came in a couple minutes later. "He'll be a second." Kurt gave a slow nod.

Blaine came over and wrapped his arms tightly around his trembling body.

The doctor came in a moment later. "Alright, so to get started, do we know what we're doing yet?"

"We'd like to know any risks."

"Of keeping the baby?"

Blaine only nodded, keeping a comforting hand on his husband.

The doctor took in a breath before looking through papers and began to explain. "Well, considering this would be Kurt's fourth time giving birth, there will be some risks. If you decide on keeping the baby, your energy levels will decrease more than the previous pregnancies, and you will have to be more health cautious than ever. Eating foods with great values of nutrition for all of you, and the baby's systems is very important." The doctor continued.

"Now when it comes to the birth," the doctor took a deep breath before continuing, quickening Kurt's pulse. "Your body being used to it will work out smoothly, but it will be very strenuous."

"And is…" Blaine swallowed hard. "The other option available?" he asked hesitantly.

The doctor nodded with a deep breath. "There's always abortion."

"And it'll be safe?"

"Safe, but not completely pain-free." He sated matter-of-factly. Blaine nodded slowly, biting his lip."

"Because of the weakness it will cause him," he continued on. "Kurt will have to be admitted to the hospital a week before the birth. And have to have double the appointments, just to be safe, so check-ups will be every one to two months."

"We understand." Blaine nodded.

"Are you planning on making any decisions today?"

He took a deep breath before answering. "Yes."

The doctor nodded. "Would you like to be alone again?"

"Please." Blaine confirmed as he looked to Kurt.

"I'll be in the hall." He said as he left them alone in the room.

"What are you thinking?" He asked Kurt softly, rubbing his back.

Kurt took a deep breath. "I know it's my body. But I want your opinion.

"I-I can't bear seeing you in any pain at all, Kurt, and that's the truth," He stated looking into his eyes. "It kills me watching you do this especially since there's only so much I can do to help.

Kurt nodded with a shaky breath, eyes fixed on the floor tiles. "Do you want this baby?"

Blaine looked to the tiles as well, blinking back moisture.

Kurt looked to him after a couple seconds passed without a response.

"I'm not answering that."

Kurt sniffled. "I need to know."

Blaine looked up. "Tell me your thoughts first."

The spot light now back on him, Kurt looked back to the ground. "I think I might want the baby." He stated quietly.

"Then we'll have the baby." He told him firmly.

Kurt shook his head. "Not if it hurts you, if you think we can't handle it, then please tell me." He said softly, looking Blaine back in the eyes.

"It's not that we can't handle it once it's here. It's the part where it practically kills you to get there." Blaine said darkly.

"It won't kill me."

"You don't know that."

"I feel like I can do it," Looking at Blaine he could see his tears begin to form. "But I will have an abortion if you think that's the right decision."

"Kurt," Tears began to fall from his eyes, having no way to possibly hold them in. "This is the hardest decision of my life." He said helplessly.

"I know," he said equally as weak. "I don't want to have to make it."

Blaine emitted a shaky breath. "Kurt, if there was a baby somewhere that needed to be adopted, I'd take the opportunity and run, but this baby's different. This one may not even live." He said with a harsh difficulty in his voice. "I don't want to lose another baby after loving it for months. When we lost that baby for no reason, that was the worst moment of my life, and I can't stand the thought that it might happen again. All I want is control over something, and I have none right now."

More tears escaped from his tear duct. "S-so what exactly does t-that mean?" Kurt asked shakily.

"I have no idea." He answered emotionless.

Kurt wiped his falling tears. "I feel like I can do this, Blaine. I would do whatever I could." He took a deep breath. "But if you don't want me to do this, all you have to do is say so."

"I cant." Blaine told him almost interrupting him towards the end. "I'm sorry, I can't because every thought that goes through my head has a reason not to do it."

Kurt swallowed as more tears fell. "I'm so sorry Blaine, this is just as hard for you as it is for me." He shook his head. "Even more."

"On one hand I feel like a murderer, and on the other I feel like I'm torturing my husband," He looked down in shame.

"Don't feel that way." Kurt told him.

"But it's the truth." Blaine stated, this time interrupting Kurt's last word.

"No it's not, it wont be your fault."

Blaine shook his head, with a pure hesitation to continue on. "You'll hate me."

This had Kurt immediately turn his head toward his husband. "Blaine," He began in a firm but soft tone. "Nothing could ever make me hate you."

"Kurt, I d-don't want you to be pregnant again," He had to breathe out through his sobs. "But it's your final decision and I will support you no matter what." Blaine tried his best to inhale a deep breath to follow the statement, to ensure Kurt he had full belief in him.

He just looked down, and closed his eyes tightly, taking in a harsh breath to hold back more crying.

"But that doesn't mean I won't love the baby if you decide otherwise because I will." He made sure to put down; breaking Kurt's forth wall as he once again began to cry, attempting a slow nod.

Each and every word spoken was just another stab to Blaine's heart, there was no winning in this, nobody would have a victory, and each and every situation there was to come to terms with would end with a wounded memory to look back upon.

Not just that, but each other. They knew either way one of them would end up aching in pain, and they both felt absolutely, completely, helpless. Blaine had to sit down, as soon as he did, his hands supported his head as his palms were soon soaked in tears. Looking at each other, feeling equally as broken, Kurt shakily curled up on the table to go on with his sobs.

Blaine made his way over to Kurt as he was gasping for breath, Kurt curling up in a fetal position even tighter.

"We'll keep him." Blaine told him quietly, rubbing his back.

Kurt just shook his head. "Y-You don't w-want to."

"I don't want to see you go through all the pain and suffering."

"I-If you don't want to t-then I wont."

This did no help for anything and they both knew it, but neither of them knew when all of this denial of making this decision was over; they weren't coming to terms anytime soon.

"Stop doing this to me." Blaine sobbed.

"I'm not, I'm saying I won't if you don't want me to." They both had each other's consideration in mind; although it being no help to what needed to be done.

"But what do you want? Part of my decision is based on how you broke down when the doctor told us."

Fast tears burned down Kurt's red cheeks as he answered. "I'm just scared. But I'm not going to keep the baby if that's not what you want."

All these thoughts were overwhelming Blaine's head, keeping the baby, all the finances, his job, Kurt's happiness, the kids, Jacob's education, it was all so much, it was happening all in one day and he felt like he couldn't take any more.

"I don't know, I don't know!" Blaine exclaimed in a panicked state, his lungs gasping for more breath than he could manage to take in, the sobs interrupting his every thought. His body slid down the wall, and he put the crying into his knees as it shook his body violently.

Kurt walked over to him; the comfort Blaine needed now transferring onto his shoulders. His eyes widened as Blaine's nails dug into his arms, and the crying only increased.

"B-Blaine," Kurt started softly yet weak, wrapping his arms around Blaine's shaking body. "Shh, it'll be okay. Take deep breaths, please."

Blaine couldn't do it, he wouldn't calm down till he knew of what could possibly be done about this.

"P-Please Blaine," Kurt began to rock him gently. "I promise we'll work it out, I promise."

Blaine's sobs just turned into Kurt, unable to gain control over even his own body. "You said you wouldn't hate me." He said through the sobs.

"I don't I don't Blaine," He reassured him. "I swear I love you more than anything." He held him close, trying to put every ounce of positivity he had into his voice.

"I swear to you we'll get through this." Kurt told him, kissing his head.

Blaine shook his head, denial the side of every thought. He wasn't the only one in the room with doubts.

"I swear," Kurt repeated, wiping his tears. "You have to trust me."

"I'm t-trying." Blaine gasped in each breath, gripping Kurt's shirt tightly. "But-but I c-can't!"

If it was even possible, more helplessness washed over them both.

"Please," Kurt begged chocking back his own sobs. "You need to listen to me right now." He told Blaine, looking in his eyes, blinking fast.

He had to bite his lip to keep the crying contained, but he gave a slight nod, letting in any comfort possible.

"I will not let you down. I will do whatever it takes to get though this for our family." He told Blaine, as he brushed a stray strand of hair from his face. "If you want to have this baby, and love it together and keep it in our family then I will. I will deal with this pain and make it bearable so it will be okay." He swallowed to continue. "And if we decide to get an abortion, then I know you will be there to hold my hand. And it'll be okay. The main decision is what's right for our family. And whatever we both decide that is, I swear to my grave I will do what it takes to make this work out. Do you understand?" He asked to make it clear, holding Blaine's head firmly with his.

Blaine took in a shaky breath, one deeper and more effective than all the others, and nodded. His eyes quickly blinking away access moisture.

"It always turns out okay." Kurt kissed his head, followed by a tight hug from Blaine as cries once again escaped his body.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry." Blaine told him, the volume of the sobs increasing.

"No, no, don't apologize." He said softly, stroking his hair, holding Blaine as the sobs turned into his shoulder.

Kurt just swallowed once more, rubbing his husbands back. "Shh, it's okay. I'm here, I'm here, it'll be okay." A sigh of relief came out of him as Blaine's breaths finally deepened.

"There you go." Kurt nodded, encouraging the slow pace.

This was so exhausting, mentally, emotionally, and physically.

"I love you." Blaine told him softly.

"I love you too Blaine, so so much."

As the comfort continued for a while, the thought of making a decision almost left both of their minds, before being rudely reminded."

"I d-don't know what to do."

"We need to think about the kids, and what would be best for our family." Blaine nodded along, blinking against the tears.

"Now, not talking about the pain part of it all. Do you think another kid would be a good idea?"

"I d-don't know because there's not only the extra money we need, but I really don't think we'd have enough time to properly care for it."

Kurt took a shaky breath, nodding. "Is there any reasoning in your head that has statements of keeping it?"

"It's part of you."

"Is that all?"

More tears fell at the sense of defeat coming over him. "I-I think so." After Kurt nodded he continued. "What about you?" Blaine wiped his eyes, almost wincing at the burning he felt on his bottom eyelid. "Do you think it's a good idea?"

"I'm not sure." He answered looking down. "I was thinking about how Jacob may be moved out by the time the baby would be born." He swallowed before continuing. "But there's still the money and the time."

Blaine rubbed his face. "Why should we keep it?"

This weakened Kurt to his core as the moisture built up, blurring his vision. "It's _ours, we_ made it." His voice cracked.

Blaine nodded as the tears made their way out, looking at his hands.

"I mean, is there any part of you that wants to keep it…just because you _want_ to?" He took in a shaky breath, almost hesitating to ask the question.

"K-Kurt."

Kurt only turned to him.

"Do what's right to you." He stated simply.

"That's not what matters, our family matters." As Blaine nodded, He shakily got to his feet.

"What are you doing?" Blaine asked standing next to him, weak in the knees.

"I-I thought we decided."

"What's the decision?"

"I guess an abortion." The response was followed with a harsh breath, looking away as the tears fell. He felt truly ashamed at the words, like he was giving up on his child.

"No, no Kurt."

Kurt closed his eyes, not ready for this to become more complex. "I thought that's what you wanted."

Sobs shook out of his body. Even coming to a decision, it was never real enough to go through. "I-I can tell it's not what you want."

"Well, what I want doesn't matter. I have a family better than I could ever imagine, and I love you all so much. I'm not about to make a decision that will just please me."

Blaine's sobs stayed consistent. "You'll regret it."

"I need to do what's right."

"Kurt," Blaine's hands shook as he took hold of Kurt's arms. "You need to promise me something and be dead serious with your answer." He took a deep breath.

"You will not in any way purposely hurt yourself after this. Do you promise me that?"

More tears glided down Kurt's cheek. "What do you mean, after this?"

"Whatever you choose."

"Do we have the money?" He asked with a deep shaky breath. Blaine only closed his eyes, slowly shaking his head.

There was no way out of it, they both knew. Kurt gave a weak nod, chocking back the sobbing he knew there was no use holding back.

"We could find it though…there is a way."

"What way?" Kurt asked immediately, trying his very hardest not to get his hopes up.

"J-Jacobs college fund."

Kurt shook his head, not allowing it to be an option. "I'm not taking from that."

"Kurt, you want this baby. I'm going to give you this baby. "

"No. I'm not going to take away from Jacob's future." He took a deep breath. Before one option made it's way in. "I'll find another job. One that pays more."

"No, you can't do that." Blaine argued. "You're living your dream Kurt. I'll find another job."

Kurt just shook his head. They might as well have both come to terms with the fact neither of them would let go of this. "I'm not letting you do that, I cannot do that to you," He told Blaine just as firmly. "I will not let you."

"Why? I'm being fired anyways." He stated so harsh to himself Kurt slightly cringed. "The new job doesn't pay as much." He let out a shaky sigh. "Kurt, this is something you really want, I'll make it happen. And like I said, Jacob can just stay home, that'll definitely cut costs."

Kurt took a deep breath, preparing an argument as calm as he could, knowing how much Blaine cared. "I would rather live with this baby than live my dream. It would kill me every day knowing I'm the reason you had to find a new job."

"Kurt, no, I'm sorry but I won't let you quit." He told him, making it even clearer neither of them would break.

"I will quit for the baby."

Every statement killed Blaine even more, this was doing nothing for the real problem, and they both knew it. "That makes no sense." Tears following his words. "You-you make way more than me. I d-don't even want my job. K-Kurt, don't do this." He pleaded.

Kurt wiped his tears, blinking against his own as he took a deep shaky breath. "Blaine, neither of us should even h-have to do this." He said with a hard swallow. "We shouldn't get rid of our jobs or have to dig into out child's college fund." Kurt's voice cracked while explaining. "We have to get the abortion." He said barley above a whisper.

No words that anyone had ever said to Blaine ever hurt as much as that very sentence.

"We would love it _so_ much." He said in such a weak state, it was as if half the life was drained from him.

"I know we would." Kurt said, holding back his sobs with all his might, knowing if he started he would never stop.

"An a-ab-" Blaine started, but shook his head, unable to finish the word. "Is the easy way out."

"I know. But we c-can't put all our finance at risk and lose everything." He couldn't help but cry at the thoughts.

Blaine just sobbed into his shirt. There was nothing left to do. Everything was said; everything that could be done was stated and thrown away at the glance of a flaw. It was all over.

"I'm sorry." Kurt sobbed, never had he been more ashamed of himself. "I am so so sorry."

He only cried harder. "What'll happen to us, Kurt?"

"What do you mean?" He asked as more tears grazed over his face.

"We're g-going to be hurting after this. We have four kids at home waiting to go to a beach." He shook his head, already picturing everyone's faces.

Kurt gave a weak nod, wiping his eyes although knowing they would just be poured on again. "Then we have to be strong for them."

Blaine knew that was exactly what they needed to do. All this stress was the last thing that needed to be added to their family. The both of them took time to pull themselves together, taking deep breaths, making their faces even redder with all the rubbing and wiping at the moisture.

A bit later, Blaine kneeled onto one knee, so he was facing Kurt's stomach. Fighting back against all the sobs, he scrambled with himself to get the words out. And with a last breath, and a voice weaker and more defeated than Kurt had ever heard, Blaine whispered, "Goodbye, bud. Say hi to your sister for me and dad."

If anything had the power to shake Kurt to his very core, that was it. He cried, and he cried _hard_, the sobs completely out of his control. They both shook, and continued on with the same repetitive actions of the evening.

"I-I c-can't." Kurt's body was shaking violently with the sobs.

Blaine could do nothing but provide him comfort. They held each other, and just cried, the tears falling in all different directions as their bodies turned. Both of them beginning to feel all too familiar with the room, sitting having the same thoughts, the same arguments and conversations. Nobody deserved this. They wouldn't wish it on their worst enemy.

"I really don't know if I can do this." Kurt stated after a while. "But I know we have to." He said chocking back a sob he was just to exhausted to let go.

Blaine could only give a slight nod. "Love is unconditional, but being able to care for a baby," he hesitated to continue. "Has a price."

They couldn't do this anymore. "Let's go home. Because Kurt," He told him, gently cupping his cheek. "We both know how this is going to end." He said giving Kurt a tiny smile.

Kurt tried his best to work his muscles into a smile, as he nodded in agreement.

Then, Blaine kissed him _hard_. Trying to give him all the power of trying to drift off each and every emotion of the painful evening.

As he pulled away, Blaine leaned their foreheads together to look straight into Kurt's eyes. "We can do this." He told his softly. "I'm not ready to give up."

Kurt swallowed and nodded. "Me neither."

"We're going to do this Kurt." Though the words were strong, the questions and doubts couldn't help but linger in Kurt's mind.

"Yeah." Kurt breathed.

"Now, if you don't mind, I'd like to take my son home."

"Alright." He said straight after with a deep breath.

"But Kurt, " Blaine turned back to him, looking into his red eyes. "Are you okay with this? And tell me the truth. Do you want to keep this baby?"

Tears formed as the answer already was in Kurt's mind, him almost aching to say it. "I would be lying if I said I didn't want him," he started, lightly setting a hand over his stomach. "But I know what needs to be done."

Blaine was just defeated, he couldn't argue even if he wanted to.

Kurt blinked back tears as he stared at the door. "Let's go."

"But…you just said."

"I said I knew what needed to be done." He shook his head.

"I-I…the doctor…I'm…Kurt…you can't just…with a hanger or something." Blaine was terrified at the thoughts and words. "That's where I draw the line." He cried.

"What are you trying to say?" Tears of his own continued to fall.

"I don't understand what you're saying."

"I'm saying we only have one option at this point, we can't keep him."

"Th-then I think we should do it now." Blaine's voice cracked, and Kurt's eyes couldn't help but widen. The thought of doing it today almost didn't seem like anything in his mind after all that had already happened.

"Now?" He asked weakly.

"If you say we're doing this, I'm not going to make it harder and have us get attached to it."

Kurt softly cried at the thought of giving his child up, it had never seemed so real.

"Are you s-sure we can't k-keep him?" He said with one final plea.

"You-you just said…"

"I know," Kurt sobbed weakly. "It just hurts so bad."

"It's now or never." He told him quietly through the tears.

"I know what I said." He repeated with his eyes closed, trying to make it easier in any way possible. "But I just n-need to know if there's any way."

"Is there?" Blaine asked him with an intake of a sharp breath.

"Only with a better job I think." He shrugged wiping his tears, he knew not for the last time.

"Your job is fine. I'll get a new one."

Kurt looked in his eyes, learning to now ignore the tears. "I need to know, that you're okay with doing this." He said, holding Blaine's hands in his own. "I don't want this to hurt you, I don't want you missing your job." It was followed with a sniffle. "Please, tell me the complete truth. "

"Kurt, there's nothing to miss. I was demoted, there's nothing going for me. I'm just going to need your help to be honest." He took a deep breath.

"All I need is to know that you're okay with this, every single thing."

"I'm not okay with the amount of pain you'll be in, but I know we'll be in way more pain if…you know." Kurt nodded. "It's up to you." He finished in a whisper.

"I can't make this decision." He refused, shaking his head.

"I want to know what you think."

"Will you regret it if we don't get an abortion? Will it be to much for us to handle?" He asked Blaine cautiously.

"Can you really regret having a baby?" He answered with a question.

Kurt shook his head again. "I mean, will we have everything we need? Or will we be too overwhelmed?"

"I-I don't know." And he truly didn't.

"It's the future we need to think about." He once again pointed out.

"We can't, can we?" Blaine bit his lip.

"I don't know," Kurt repeated after him. "That's the problem. I am 100% okay going through this pain for the baby. I'll do whatever it takes, but it is what's right for our family now that I care about. So if we are unable to get what we need, we know we can't. But if there is any chance we have of keeping him, I will take it."

Blaine nodded in agreement.

"So to answer your question," He took a shaky breath. "I don't know." He repeated dully.

"I'll call my parents."

"For what?" Kurt was in instant confusion.

"Money," He stated as if it was obvious, which it was at the moment. "It's no secret they have it despite the divorce. Kurt, if we have this baby, I want to stay home. There is no way we can hire a nanny." He shook his head. "My parents…they have to give us the money. They have to." He breathed the last part in desperation for what he knew was their last chance.

"I can't ask them for it, I would feel terrible."

"I can and I wouldn't." Blaine said instantly with no hesitation. "This is for our family."

Kurt gave a small nod, as he sniffled, still he couldn't help but feel bad with the request.

"I'll be right back." Blaine kissed his head, and left the room.

It was only the second time Kurt had been left alone in that room all day. He had almost forgotten what it felt like to be surrounded by pure silence. His heart was pounding in anticipation. There was nothing he had ever wanted more. If he could go to Blaine's parents and beg and plea he would, he wondered if they even knew how anything like this felt, the desperation had a constant ache in their hearts. Please, let them say yes. _Please._

Kurt's head immediately turned as the door opened to reveal Blaine.

But Blaine only closed his eyes as his head shook, and Kurt's heart sunk. "I-I'm sorry, if I wasn't…" he trailed off, knowing Kurt caught on. "Then we would be fine."

Tears fell in defeat as Kurt nodded.

"My mom will give us some, but my dad has most of the money, and he won't. I'm sorry, I am so sorry."

"No Blaine, don't, you have nothing to be sorry for. Thank you for asking them."

Blaine's weak, lifeless body sat down in a chair, and all he could do was pull up his knees to cry into. "I'm sorry." Kurt came over to comfort him right away, his immediate mission to let Blaine know he did nothing wrong. Kurt softly wrapped his arms around Blaine's sobbing figure.

"No, no, shh, please don't." He said with a light voice. "It's okay."

"It's my fault though, everything, it's my fault."

"No it is not, none of this is your fault Blaine," He told him blinking away tears as his voice cracked. "Please don't say that. Please."

"But it's the truth and you know it." He sobbed. "I'm gay so I can't get money from my dad. I didn't go to college so I can't get a real job. I forgot the condom so now we have to face the hardest decision of our lives."

"Don't." Kurt cried at a loss for words. "Stop saying that. I love you more than anything in the world, and you don't know how much it hurts me when you sit here and degrade yourself." He sniffled, tilting Blaine's chin up to look into his eyes. "We can't let that happen, it will make everything worse. All we have said has been negative and it is doing nothing for us." He broke out, having to state it all. Having all the hope his words will have some kind of impact.

Blaine had gasping breaths as his tears fell, and he nodded. "I'm sorry." He once again apologized. "Kurt held him close, rubbing his back.

"I don't like this. Why can't it be easy?"

"I don't know." Kurt sighed in defeat of not having an answer for his husband.

"What will you regret more?"

"The abortion." Kurt breathed. "What about you?"

"The s-same." They just hugged each other tightly, at a loss for words. Blaine cried into Kurt's shoulder, unable to hide any more of his emotions.

"Shh, it's alright, it'll be okay." Kurt kissed his head.

"Will it?" Blaine's eyes looked helplessly into Kurt's.

Kurt only nodded. "It always turns out okay."

"So a baby?"

"Are you asking whether we are keeping him or not?"

Blaine nodded to clear up his questioning.

"I don't mean to repeat myself. But if we have the money, yes, I would like to keep him." He looked down allowing the tears to fall.

Blaine kissed his forehead. "Jacob can stay home. I'll beg for my job back, and I'll get a job for the summer."

"I c-cant do that to Jacob." Kurt once again stated, firm on not allowing that to happen.

"He wants to stay home."

"But I'm not going to take away from his dream. What if he regrets not going to college? I don't want him mad at us for this. I just can't do that."

Blaine took in a shaky breath. "You're right." He agreed quietly.

"Do you have any ideas?" He asked hopefully, stroking Kurt's hair.

"None." He shook his head in disappointment of his failure. "Just the job."

"I'll try to get one."

"I don't want to ask to much of you Blaine."

"Kurt. I thought you knew me well enough to know that I'll do anything for our family." And Kurt knew it was true.

"I know."

"I can do it." He tilted Kurt's chin up. "Please trust me. I'm trusting you to fight your ass off and get this baby here in our arms in nine months, and that's a tall order." He said with a soft smile through the tears. "Please trust me to help support our family."

Kurt took a deep breath, and finally, in that whole heart-aching evening, a smile spread across his face. "I do, completely."

"I can do it."

"I know you can, I'm sure of it,"

"I'm getting my job back, Kurt, I swear,"

"I know you can get it back." Kurt told him with full confidence.

"I really want this baby."

"I do too, so so much." Kurt breathed with desperation. Blaine smiled at him, and kissed his nose. A small sense of some success building up somewhere inside of him.

"I love you so much, thank you for everything, all of this." He smiled.

"All of what?" He smirked. "Kurt, I sat here and cried and blamed myself for everything, and almost threw our sons dreams out the window."

Kurt shook his head with a small smile and Blaine hugged him tightly. "Last time." Making Kurt's smile widen.

"One thing, during these next nine months, I want you to prove something to all these doctors out there expecting us to give up." He told Kurt.

He took a deep breath and nodded. "I will, I promise."

"We have to show them the Hummel's don't give up, and are strong, and they can't scare us."

Kurt smiled with full confidence. "Exactly."

They took one last look at that room. Remembering all the events, all the news, all the tears, and the hopes they had lost. Then, they walked out the door, leaving it all behind. Forever.


End file.
